4 First Chapter Fails: How To Keep Readers Hooked (Without Screwing It Up)

First chapters are brutal. They have to do everything—hook the reader, establish the protagonist, set up the world, hint at the larger conflict, and most importantly, make us care enough to keep turning pages.

But most first chapters don’t.

They meander. They front-load backstory. They introduce too many characters or, worse, no real character at all—just an anonymous figure floating through generic scenery, thinking about their life in ways no real person actually thinks.

And that’s the fatal mistake. If a reader doesn’t connect—if they don’t feel tension, curiosity, or investment—they will put the book down. They will walk away, because why wouldn’t they? There are a thousand other books waiting.

So what goes wrong? What makes a first chapter fall flat? And how do you avoid the most common pitfalls?

Mistake #1: Starting Too Early (The “Nothing is Happening” Problem)

This is the classic slow start—where we meet the protagonist, see their world, get a sense of their life… and yet, nothing actually happens.

The protagonist wakes up. They make coffee. They go to work. They walk through their town, thinking about life.

Meanwhile, the reader is waiting for something—anything—to happen.

Why It’s a Problem

Readers don’t need a neutral ordinary world. They need an ordinary world that already feels unstable—where tension is brewing beneath the surface, even before the inciting incident happens.

If the protagonist’s life is too normal, there’s no urgency to keep reading.

Signs You Started Too Early

• The protagonist spends multiple chapters just existing—going to work, chatting with friends, thinking about life.
• The story doesn’t move until Chapter Three.
• The protagonist isn’t hoping for anything to change (and then suddenly, something does).

How to Fix It

Start closer to the moment of change. The protagonist’s world should already feel unstable or incomplete.

• Introduce tension immediately—a sense that something is wrong, something is coming.
• Make sure your first chapter takes place on an important day—a day where something is already shifting.
• Show the protagonist on the edge of change, even before the inciting incident hits.

For more guidance on crafting compelling openings, check out: How to Start Your Story: The Ordinary World, the Hook, and the Art of Making Readers Care.

Example of a Slow Start (Wrong Way)

A woman wakes up, eats breakfast, goes to work, chats with a coworker, goes home. Nothing happens until Chapter Three, when she gets a mysterious letter.

Example of a Stronger Start (Right Way)

A woman wakes up excited for the biggest job interview of her life—but the second she arrives, she finds out the job has already been given away.

Now we have stakes, tension, and movement—all before the inciting incident.

Mistake #2: Starting Too Late (The “Where Am I and Why Should I Care?” Problem)

The opposite of the slow start is the rushed opening—where the book throws readers into chaos without context.

The protagonist is already in a car chase, a battle, a high-stakes moment—but we don’t know who they are, where we are, or why any of this matters.

Why It’s a Problem

Action without context is just noise. If we don’t understand the protagonist’s world before it explodes, the explosion has no impact.

A chase scene means nothing if we don’t know who’s being chased, why it matters, or what they stand to lose.

Signs You Started Too Late

• The book opens in the middle of action, but we have no reason to care.
• The protagonist is already in a magical world, a battle, a dangerous situation before we understand what they want.
• The scene is fast-moving but emotionally hollow.

How to Fix It

• Give readers a reason to care before the action starts. Even one page of grounding can make a huge difference.
• Anchor the reader in a moment of normalcy before the chaos begins. Let us see what the protagonist’s life was supposed to be before it was disrupted.
• Make sure the protagonist already has a goal. That way, when it’s ripped away, we feel the loss.

Example of a Rushed Start (Wrong Way)

A man wakes up on a spaceship mid-crash, alarms blaring, no memory of how he got there. He immediately has to fight off aliens.

This might sound exciting, but without an emotional connection, it feels hollow. Why do we care if he survives? What was his life before this?

Example of a Stronger Start (Right Way)

A man prepares for the biggest job interview of his life. He’s anxious but hopeful—this is his last chance to turn things around. But just as he steps onto the train, he blacks out—and wakes up on a spaceship mid-crash.

Same action scene. But now we care.

Mistake #3: The Fake Hook (When the Prologue Doesn’t Matter)

This happens when a book opens with an action-packed prologue—but then jumps to a slow, unrelated first chapter.

Readers are instantly hooked by the prologue… and then bored by Chapter One.

Why It’s a Problem

If the prologue is more exciting than Chapter One, the reader feels cheated. They were promised one kind of story, but got another.

Signs Your Prologue is a Fake Hook

• It’s exciting, but disconnected from the main story.
• It introduces characters who don’t appear again for a long time.
• It’s so intense that Chapter One feels dull in comparison.

How to Fix It

• If your prologue is more exciting than Chapter One, ask: Why isn’t the book starting there instead?
• If you must have a prologue, make sure it connects immediately to the main story.

Example of a Weak Prologue (Wrong Way)

A knight fights a dragon in an epic battle. Then, in Chapter One, we switch to a farm girl picking apples and thinking about her future.

Example of a Stronger Prologue (Right Way)

A knight fights a dragon—and loses. Cut to Chapter One: a farm girl finds the knight’s sword in the woods, realizing something terrible has happened.

Now, the prologue sets up the story instead of distracting from it.

Mistake #4: No Emotional Anchor (Why Should We Care?)

The book starts with plot, but no character investment. We understand what’s happening, but we don’t feel connected.

Why It’s a Problem

Readers might understand the stakes, but they won’t care.

Plot is what happens. Emotion is what makes it matter.

How to Fix It

• Give the protagonist something to hope for.
• Make them want something before the story takes it away.
• Show their emotional state, not just their actions.

Example of a Weak Start (Wrong Way)

A woman is walking to work when suddenly, she’s attacked by a stranger.

Example of a Stronger Start (Right Way)

A woman is walking to work, rehearsing the speech she’s about to give at her company’s biggest event. She’s spent years preparing for this moment—finally, things are turning around for her. Then, out of nowhere, a stranger attacks.

Same action scene, but now it means something.

5 Fresh First Chapter Examples

Here are five standout examples of first chapters that powerfully hook readers—and precisely why they succeed:

1. The Secret History by Donna Tartt

Why it works:
Tartt immediately reveals a murder and the killers in the opening lines, crafting a literary hook filled with dread, suspense, and moral complexity. Rather than asking “what happens?” readers become obsessed with discovering “why?” It’s psychological intrigue done brilliantly.

2. Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn

Why it works:
Flynn starts by vividly exposing the cracks in Nick and Amy’s marriage through Nick's unsettling narration on their anniversary morning. The subtle tension, unreliable voice, and immediate sense of hidden dysfunction promise mystery and compelling conflict right from page one.

3. The Martian by Andy Weir

Why it works:
Weir kicks off with astronaut Mark Watney abandoned alone on Mars, injured, and presumed dead. The opening chapter’s immediacy, grim humor, and crystal-clear stakes set up both emotional investment and urgent narrative drive: survival.

4. Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury

Why it works:
Bradbury opens vividly with Montag, a “fireman,” gleefully burning books—his shocking yet mundane normal routine immediately conveys a warped society. Clarisse’s quiet questioning quickly challenges his beliefs, foreshadowing profound transformation.

5. American Gods by Neil Gaiman

Why it works:
Shadow is introduced during his final days in prison, only to discover his wife has died tragically. The chapter masterfully layers character-driven emotional weight with strange encounters and dark foreshadowing, leaving readers eager to follow Shadow’s uncertain journey into mystery.

These first chapters excel because they do more than intrigue—they swiftly establish character depth, conflict, and narrative promise, immediately drawing readers into immersive worlds they won't want to leave.

Your First Chapter is About Connection, Not Just Action

Starting too early makes the book feel slow.
Starting too late makes it hard to connect.

A great opening balances momentum with character depth.

Readers don’t just need a reason to keep turning pages.
They need a reason to care about the person in those pages.

And if you can make them care? They’ll follow your protagonist anywhere.

Ready to craft a first chapter that hooks readers from the start? Try Sudowrite now!